very good points. interestingly enough I don’t feel compelled to march for either cause…

The Crunk Feminist Collective

Nearly two Wednesdays ago, after a long day in the office, I frantically drove home, donned one of three dark hoodies that I own, hopped a train to NYC from Jersey, met another Sista Prof friend and made it via taxi to Union Square just in time to participate in the first One Million Hoodies for Trayvon Martin March, which had been announced only the day before.

After hearing from Trayvon’s parents and the family’s attorney, we burst into the streets of Manhattan, speaking Trayvon’s name, almost as if the fervency of our incantations would call this boy, this young Lazarus, back to life. The energy in the air was nothing short of electric. We were not there when Trayvon begged for his life on a suburban lawn in Florida. But our collective screams on his behalf hopefully served to amplify his own screams that night.

I have been taken…

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never leave my room again

Adron just might be the soundtrack to my life right now. I was pleasantly surprised by a gem at the end of the mix, undefined. But why would I be surprised.

Oh how interesting my life would be if I never left my room again. It depends on how much it snows.

and I’m out.

With this fortune cookie, I ordered shrimp lo mein. There were no shrimp. I am beginning to see the bigger picture here. As I’m reminded about the hundreds of thousands of animals, who mysteriously died over the first week of the year.  So far “experts” say that fireworks caused the death of hundreds of thousands of birds, in a few southern states and Norway, and I’m not sure the verdict on the mass fish and crab deaths. for whatever reason, over the past few days, the energy of the new year and resolutions, I found myself contemplating complete vegetarianism. And this shrimpless shrimp lo-mein serves only as a sign. Until now, I hadn’t considered the consumption of meat or seafood as a threat to life itself, although our industry practices have always been.

I think getting this particular fortune is amusing. I am very into metaphysics, and it’s responsible in part for me deciding to become pescatarian, now vegetarian. Without going into too many details, I can say, this is it. I absolutely get it. As we approach 2012…things are definitely changing. One theory I’ve come across relates to the earth’s vibration. Basically, as earth vibrates higher, certain behaviors,diseases,plants,and animals will cease.  One particular sign of this time would be more and more people opting for vegetarian and vegan options, as consuming meat produces a low vibration. In fact, eating and digesting food in general is a slow process, and the theory suggests that people will start to juice fruits and vegetables.

The other day I said to a friend that 2011 is my last year eating. She seemed confused and unconvinced, but now more than ever I am convinced, it is going to be necessary. If not just for vibrational reasons, but the fact that many species might become unsafe to eat, in addition to food not being readily available.

Who knows what the future holds, but I’ll continue to study metaphysics, and appreciate the omens and life.


eclipse musings

what an amazing feeling. chanting, as the moon is eclipsed. I swear I saw a shooting star. of course I made a wish. It was a big wish. But I have big dreams.

The stars never seemed so bright, as they danced around the moon. They must’ve known there was a show going on. The sky is clear and perfect for viewing, the longest night of the year, the brightest and darkest all in the same. I don’t know if it gets any more extraordinary than this. Perhaps if tomorrow there was a solar eclipse. I jest. But I cannot help but remark on this once in a lifetime opportunity.

Today, I began reading the Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, and as I’ve come to know, there is no such thing as coincidence. I sat outside, bundled up, but it was even warmer than it has been, or maybe I’m warmer. I heard an airplane approaching. It looked as if it were falling out of the sky. It reminded me of a dream I had a few months back. I was sitting outside, a picnic scenario. Me, Emily and maybe some other people. In my dream it must’ve been the fourth of july. We were watching fireworks. All of a sudden, I realized the latest spectacular wasn’t a firework at all. It was an airplane exploding. It’s flaming pieces falling towards us. This could’ve been the end, and perhaps it was an end. I say that knowing nothing ever truly ends.

One thing I know about eclipses is that they are final, irreversible. Whatever is done around one, cannot be undone. They bring about dramatic changes, which is ironic but not. Change was the theme for 2010. So many situations were in flux; they continue to be. Here I am faced with yet another changing situation, my residence. I am hopeful that this move will be final, and that I will actually be settled.

I am thankful for moments like this where I can contemplate life, my purpose and the grand scheme. I feel so connected and I know this is only the beginning.

My wish is that everyone comes to realize their true nature, recognize and accept their power.

“There is one great truth on this planet: whoever you are, or whatever it is that you do, when you really want something, it’s because that desire originated in the soul of the universe. It’s your mission on Earth. And when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”—The Alchemist


everything in its right place

what do you hope to accomplish before the end?


the only thing i expect to know is love. to accept and appreciate


last night i had a strange dream, which i guess you could say became lucid at a certain point. That point being, when i attempted to turn on a light switch. I’m not sure where I was exactly, or what any of the circumstances might’ve been, at this point. so i had the thought turn on the light, turn on the light, but quickly realized, it’s not going to work, this is a dream. (I learned from waking life that you can’t control the lights by a switch in your dreams, nor can you read.)  But still my arm reached in the room, around the side of the wall, and at first there was no switch, but then i found it…but as I was thinking “it’s not going to work” the lights came on, or something, but i was pulled through the ceiling, only it was like the ceiling had opened, and the room, and the next destination were blurring together.


On another note, i feel like my dreams are in sepia. there are colors, but everything is dulled down, the light that came on, was a very pale orange. But in the next part of my dream. It seemed like I was standing at the edge of a drive way or something. I remember seeing a familiar face walking down the street, so it makes me feel like I was in LaGrange, or some alternate version of it, that’s also mixed with Atlanta, because there was a bus coming down the street. But before that. I saw another friend of mine, Anna. and we had some sort of interaction in the house, and had come outside, but I’m not really sure what. I know her parents were there, and they don’t like me, so it was sorta awkward. They were trying to get her to come with them. and they had walked off down the street, toward the bus stop. I was behind them. that’s when i saw the other familiar face, walking past me, but when I called out to him, he didn’t really notice me. I remember his blue shirt. He said something, but I don’t think it made any sense. So i started walking in the direction my friend and her parents had gone.


I’m guessing that at one point my friend might have been topless, because she had an inside out jersey of some sort wrapped around her.  She was started to adjust it, and her father who was walking beside her asked her where she got it. And she answered something like the laundry or whatever. Her mother was already at the bus stop, and I think had gotten on the bus. While she was readjusting her shirt, I noticed a mark on her back. It looked like a scab of some sort, and I could see the red blood crusted over, and I noticed the contrast between that, and her pale, pale skin. I don’t know where we were walking…but I remember i was wearing leather gloves, and a cap that had ear flaps, and it was very close to my head, which is probably impossible considering the amount of hair i have right now…but anyway, that’s all I remember about this dream


A dream I had two nights ago, had me thinking about my father. I dreamed that I walked into a chinese restaurant. I was back in FarRockaway, and I was in various restaurant situations within the dream. But I came across a man who, I’m now starting to believe was my grandfather, not my father. They are almost identical, and I’ve dreamed of my father in place of him in the past. He said if I had come any earlier, I would’ve seen his girlfriend. And i remember the comment catching me off guard, and I was kinda like, “for real?” and he was just like, well you know, and gave a little shrug. And I remember thinking, I have to tell my mom. I can’t let her go out like this. But anyway, that was the highlight of our interaction. I next remember going up to the menu, and debating about what I was going to eat. And this might sound strange…


But eating chicken has come up a lot in my dreams lately. I think chicken was the only thing on the menu at this restaurant. And, maybe last night, or the night before, I had a dream that I had taken a bite out of a wing I found in my car before throwing it out of the window. And I feel like I’ve had another dream involving chicken. I don’t really know what to make of it, but the other night, I met an intriguing woman. This is real life, haha.  Long story short, she works for a buddhist school, and is definitely involved in the spiritual/metaphysical realm. She told me that her spiritual experiences started when she moved to Philadelphia some years ago, and that when she told her psychic friend she’d be moving back, her friend told her that she’d be making lots of connections through her house. She’s roommates with one of my classmates, and their house was used as a set for a movie I worked on, in addition to a class project.


Anyhow, I inquired about her diet, because I had read/heard that as the earth vibrates higher, more and more people would become vegetarian, and abandon their usual diets, for something that allowed them to increase their frequency. And she told me that she used to be a vegetarian, but had to stop for that very reason. She said her body needed animal protein, because it grounded her, and her vibration was getting too high. I didn’t get what she fully meant by that, other than she started to feel disconnected, and like her head was always swirling. I think she mentioned headaches as well, as far as physical symptoms. But I think she was mainly referring to emotional/non physical situations. So yeah…I’m not sure what my dreams are telling me in that regard.


Perhaps me eating meat in my dreams is helping me stay grounded in the dream world?


Thoughts, comments, suggestions? I’m open!


true story


Dalí described this image as “the masculine cosmic apocalyptic monster.” He believed it to be a premonition of war.